brilliant article, mugzy. i was inspired!

So you're telling me that it's a bad idea to suck someone's cock after I've only just met them? But Cosmo told me that all the boys would like me if I did. Now I'm confused. Maybe it's the fake tan fumes messing with my head...

That was a fab article Mugz. I feel sorry for that girl, in thinking that's what she had to do to gain acceptance. Not that your friend helped the situation at all, and probably did his bit in making her feel ten times more worthless. Though it's not up to him to make her feel special in the first place. Just who do women have as role models? Young girls growing up now have the likes of Britney Spears? Wow, she's an inspiring little lady isn't she. Hopefully some of them girls are as stubborn and pig headed as me, and will realize there are other paths to follow, other than the blow job after a 30min meeting route!

Yes, most of us men ARE jerks.

1) Your friend is a prime example. He allows a girl that 'he does not find attractive at all' to pick him up, pay for him to see a film, give him a blowjob in the cinema, and take him a meal, and only after all this - on the bus - he decides to run because 'he really isn't interested in getting to know this girl'? Unbelievable.

2) Muggaz, you are a prime example too. It's hard to imagine a 'real female role model' more superficial than the picture you paint. On one hand you say that 'sex is given too much importance by a conceited society', but look at the language you use: 'beautiful female athletes', stunning woman' (sic), 'inspirational and beautiful people' versus a 'slightly overweight girl' and 'teenage slappers'. You want women to respect themselves, but with it's attitudes like yours that cause women to develop poor self-respect in the first place.

3) 'These are the woman that should be donning the magazine covers'? Even assuming you mean 'women' (plural) and 'adorning' (and not that they should be WEARING the magazine covers), in many instances (eg. so-called lifestyle, sports and health magazines) they already ARE! And on what grounds? Because of what they LOOK LIKE, not what they think or feel or say or do. (When was the last time you saw a female shot putter on the cover of one of these magazines?)

Muggaz, you have raised a serious problem here, and I congratulate you for it. However, you and your like are part of the problem.

Muggaz,

This article is very inspiring.

I agree with flooz....have you ever opened up an issue of cosmo?? It's the same thing every month: "How to trap a man" "How to have better sex" and of course the ever popular, "How to give better head"....It's sickening. Actually, this February I gave up the magazine for good. I used to read it for the fashion articles and tips, but there are less and less of those...so now I just don't read magazines.


It is really sad to admit but I think that most women in society today have either:
1)suffered from an eating dissorder
2)are currently suffering from an eating dissorder
3)want to lose weight (aka want to suffer from an eating dissorder)

All of this creates negative body image. It's really sad, I mean, at one point in my life I could admit to all three of those topics on my list. I used to have a severe complex about my weight because I thought just because I am short I needed to way under 100 lbs. That is bullshit.

Now I can proudly admit that I am 5'2 and weigh 125....and the sad thing is that's considered to be a plus sized woman because I'm a size 8.

WTF??!?!?

However, you and your like are part of the problem.

I can admit that I like a pretty girl... although I dont make any apologies for it. I respect myself, and I find woman who respect themselves and their appearance attractive as well... I can't hide that fact... I admire your stance, and you will always have the moral highground over me - I am but a testosterone driven young man... The Athletes certainly are super sexy, but you must have missed the part where I pointed out the attractive qualities of their drive and determination... the will to succeed... unfortunately, In a cock driven society, woman seem to have to work harder to earn male respect - I am trying to get the message across that sucking a cock will not win respect in my book, and nor will a pretty face! I like a pretty face, but she has to have something to back it up... she has to have passion, determination and self respect. If you think the athletes of the Olympic games got where they are by being superficial, I would suggest you dont know many professional athletes... i suppose this is a matter of perspective.

The first three comments were from females of this community that know what kind of person I am, and they aren't pretending to like my article... they are all females who know me, and they know I am not a jerk... all beautiful young ladies filled with passion and endeavour.

I try not to be the problem, and I cant really solve the problem - I merely recognise a problem exists.

Thanks for your comments all.

BAM!!!

All of this creates negative body image. It's really sad, I mean, at one point in my life I could admit to all three of those topics on my list. I used to have a severe complex about my weight because I thought just because I am short I needed to way under 100 lbs. That is bullshit.

You know, it's all too true... Some of the most genuinely nice people I know have had problems with eating disorders, because they are pressured by society to be stick thin... It's disgusting... It's often a downward spiral, because self confidence continues to depreciate.... unfortunately image is everything these days... What woman need to know from guys like me is that I respect them for just being themselves and maintaining personal integrity...

You must place your own integrity above social integrity at all costs... I hate the fact that men can be largely responsible for insecurity issues with the female gender...

BAM!!!

Great article, Muggaz.

So you're telling me that it's a bad idea to suck someone's cock after I've only just met them? But Cosmo told me that all the boys would like me if I did. Now I'm confused. Maybe it's the fake tan fumes messing with my head...

great article, muggy. go girl power !. and suz, you nailed it, babe !

miggy XXX

On one hand you say that 'sex is given too much importance by a conceited society', but look at the language you use: 'beautiful female athletes', stunning woman' (sic), 'inspirational and beautiful people' versus a 'slightly overweight girl' and 'teenage slappers'. You want women to respect themselves, but with it's attitudes like yours that cause women to develop poor self-respect in the first place.

Furry I think you have an excellent point, but the world you live in is obviously very different to the one I do. Sure it would be wonderful if we weren't judged on certain things, but the sad thing is we are. This article wasn't about how women are judged by society. We know that the majority of time we are judged by the way we like, and people like attractive people. What is attractive to them anyway. Whether that be a nice ass, a nice smile, a nice laugh, a nice personality, whatever is, you have to find something beautiful about someone. This article was about how women go about changing them viewpoints, and actually getting respect. Mugz was pointing out giving random blokes bj's isn't the way to do it. The girl in this scenario, though she has my sympathy, needs to shoulder some of the blame herself. She did it, and for what reason? Mugz was pointing out that it was wrong.

Muggaz, you have raised a serious problem here, and I congratulate you for it. However, you and your like are part of the problem.

Naughty Mugz for wanting to be attracted to something! The way women percieve themselves is the problem, and speaking as a young woman, I can say I wouldn't lower myself to a man who would just view me on a physical level. People go for what they want, and I wouldn't want a man like that.

I hate the fact that men can be largely responsible for insecurity issues with the female gender...

Grrr, me too! Stupid boys! hehe.....

and the sad thing is that's considered to be a plus sized woman because I'm a size 8.

I am so with you on this! i am obsessed with my weight. Im a size 10 in England, but I sometimes go up to a 12 (blame the boobs) and this is seen as completely unacceptable! Please, I'm not fat at all, but I should be a size 8? My sisters and Mum are all size eights, and I'm known as the fat one! It's a good job I can see the humour in this, otherwise I'd be an eating disorder waiting to happen.

Sorry for the ramble Mugz, finished now

great article

however don't you think this shows that guys are the problem of it. I mean your friend could have told her, i"m not interested in you and told her she didnt have to degrade herself, but he chose not to......I wonder what that tells the girl

cause of guys like your friend, young girls think they need to act or be a certain way for them to be liked.....if your friend could have taken that not so selfish, small step and told her she didn't have to act like that or didn't have to do anything to win the affection of a man, than maybe she would have obtained enough self esteam to not do that again....see you GUYS are the problem...not women, or loreal comercials

Mandy where have you been? I've missed our girly chats chick!

however don't you think this shows that guys are the problem of it.

Men are part of the problem, but so are we. We shouldn't look at a man to make us feel good about ourselves. We should be able to do that already.

cause of guys like your friend, young girls think they need to act or be a certain way for them to be liked.....

Because of society, and the attention girls on tv get for getting their ass out, women think that is positive behaviour. I'm happy to blame men for alot of things, and the friend here was wrong in what he did, no question. Women need to take more responsibility though, we should be strong enough not to need the acceptance of men like him in the first place.

cause of guys like your friend, young girls think they need to act or be a certain way for them to be liked

Tell me about it... I gave him the dressing down of a lifetime... come on girls!!! you know me... I went absolutely nuts at the boy... I was absoluted disgusted and I told him as much...

And there is no way you can pass the shoulder of blame squarly to the guys here ladies... as long as chicks use their tit's and ass to get what they want, because they know it works, I am afraid that the girls must shoulder a fair amount of responsibility!!!

The point is what guys like my friend think of these girls is not important... these girls need to act with self respect.. not act in such a manner that is slutty so they think they will win a guys respect - i mean seriously, who wants the respect of a guy who will cop a head job in the movies? come on... If girls are willing to settle for sub standard males, well, by all means, continue to act in such a fashion, all I am saying is that if they do continue to act in such a fashion, sub-standard is all they will get!

BAM!!!

The best thing a girl can do is not give a guy what he wants.....cos lets face it a guy only wants what he can't have.....and if a girl is going to give it up in the first 1/2 hour that they meet hes not going stick around much longer cos he's already got it....and hes not going to take you seriously cos he would just think you act this way with every guy u met (and lets face it im sure its very likely they do)

But if girls would only learn that if they hold off by giving them anything until she knows him properly, the guy will stick around a hell of alot longer, and the only thing left for you two, to do is to talk and get to know each other, and if hes not what u want you haven't wasted your time or givin yourself away to him in anyway.
and it will work out a hell of of lot easier and better for the both of you.

The girl won't feel hurt and disgusted in herself, and the guy yeah he may be thinking oh man i wasted my time on this chick and got nothing out of it but who cares, its better him feel that way about you and mayb respect you alittle, instead of him boosting to his friends about how he got some action from some "slapper" he didn't even know (just like your friend did).....and i know i would rather him respect me a tiny bit and be alittle disappointed then him calling me a slapper......cos at least i would know i did the right thing and didn't end up feeling dirty or used!!!!!!

but then again its easier said than done for some people....i only wish i could take my own advice sometimes....