A day to day acount of the whacky and wonderful world of Muggaz - i tend to be having too much fun these days, and often cannot remember moments due to debauchery - its time the internet repayed my loyalty by recording my antics.
not all black people are robbers.
Published on February 19, 2004 By Muggaz In Humor
On a recent weekend in Atlantic City, a woman won a bucketful of quarters at a slot machine. She took a break from the slots for dinner with her husband in the hotel dining room. But first she wanted to stash the quarters in her room. "I'll be right back and we'll go to eat, "she told her husband and carried the coin-laden bucket to the elevator.

As she was about to walk into the elevator she noticed two men already aboard. Both were black. One of them was tall...very tall...an intimidating figure. The woman froze.

Her first thought was: These two are going to rob me.

Her next thought was: Don't be a bigot; they look like perfectly nice gentlemen. But racial stereotypes are powerful, and fear immobilized her.

She stood and stared at the two men. She felt anxious, flustered and ashamed. She hoped they didn't read her mind but Gosh; they had to know what she was thinking!!! Her hesitation about joining them in the elevator was all too obvious now. Her face was flushed. She couldn't just stand there, so with a mighty effort of will she picked up one foot and stepped forward and followed with the other foot and was on the elevator.

Avoiding eye contact, she turned around stiffly and faced the elevator doors as they closed. A second passed, and the another second, and then another. Her fear increased! The elevator didn't move. Panic consumed her. My God, she thought, I'm trapped and about to be robbed! Her heart plummeted. Perspiration poured from every pore. Then one of the men said, "Hit the floor." Instinct told her to do what they told her. The bucket of quarters flew upwards as she threw out her arms and collapsed on the elevator floor. A shower of coins rained down on her. Take my money and spare me, she prayed.

More seconds passed.

She heard one of the men say politely, "Ma'am, if you'll just tell us what floor you're going to, we'll push the button." The one who said it had a little trouble getting the words out. He was trying mightily to hold in a belly laugh. The woman lifted her head and looked up at the two men. They reached down to help her up.

Confused, she struggled to her feet. "When I told my friend here to hit the floor," said the average sized one, "I meant that he should hit the elevator button for our floor. I didn't mean for you to hit the floor, ma'am." He spoke genially. He bit his lip. It was obvious he was having a hard time not laughing. The woman thought: My God, what a spectacle I've made of myself. She was humiliated to speak. She wanted to blurt out an apology, but words failed her. How do you apologize to two perfectly respectable gentlemen for behaving as though they were going to rob you?

She didn't know what to say. The three of them gathered up the strewn quarters and refilled her bucket. When the elevator arrived at her floor they then insisted on walking her to her room. She seemed a little unsteady on her feet, and they were afraid she might not make it down the corridor. At her door they bid her a good evening. As she slipped into her room she could hear them roaring with laughter as they walked back to the elevator.

The woman brushed herself off. She pulled herself together and went downstairs for dinner with her husband. The next morning flowers were delivered to her room - a dozen roses. Attached to EACH rose was a crisp one hundred dollar bill. The card said:

"Thanks for the best laugh we've had in years."

It was signed; Eddie Murphy & Michael Jordan



Comments
on Feb 19, 2004
I think the first time I heard this urban legend was in 1987. I think that in your incarnation, Michael Jordan has replaced Arsenio Hall.

Tell me about the Waldorf Salad.
on Feb 19, 2004
Sure man...

whats a waldorf salad?
on Feb 19, 2004
Yeah, I'm sure everyone's heard this one, but that doesn't make it any less entertaining ,does it Muggaz?

Trinitie
on Feb 20, 2004
lol that's great. I had a great laugh even it was an urban legend.

~Dan
on Feb 20, 2004
LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

great stuff, didnt know that one.

...Moore should have put it into bowling for columbine.
on Feb 21, 2004
Well I have never heard it before and I thought it was a pretty good one. Remindes me of the time I spent in Atlantic City. I was there for an entire summer one year, airbrushing t-shirts in the Ocean One mall.
There was a little ear piercing stand in the center of the mall. I was on my way one day to have lunch and got into the glass elevator when I looked up and the girl that worked the Piercing Pagoda (which had become a friend,) was leaning over the railing along with a little short familiar chubby fellow and they were both waving their arms in the air trying to get my attention.
Hmm... I thought, I'll go up and see what they want. When I got up there, I found out that it was Dom DeLouis. He was getting his other ear pierced because he was getting ready to play a little old lady in the movie, "Haunted Honeymoon."
It was like running into an old friend. Dom is a great guy!
I also had the honor of meeting Tug McGraw there too. I made him a t-shirt with a baseball and his name on it and gave it to him.
He was there making a TV commercial. Tug was country singer Tim McGraw's father. Unfortunately Tug passed away just recently. GCJ